A Poem of TIME -

As one who writes poetry, this just doesn't feel right to me. It's jarring in some places and I'm getting a lot of the "telling" of the story you are trying to convey and no "showing". Show us how time slips by. Give us an image. Use personification. Does it slip by like the forgotten touch of a lover's fingertips? You get what I mean? Don't just tell me show me.

Seraphina this poem is posted on our blog for a long time
thank you for your beauty!

Sarah

TIME

There is a place, just beyond time,
Where life slows it's pace, offering us grace
Yet we seem blind, to the ravage of time,
Ignoring the peace that is offered to mind
We let time slip by, time slips us on by.

In the space of a heartbeat, frozen and still,
Is the chance to breath in, attend to our will
Yet stand we watching the clock in despair,
Crying out to the heavens that "life is not fair."
Letting time pass us by, time passes right on by.

But when I listen, Oh Lord I can hear
The whispers of Angels that say "Do not fear!"
The sweet rush of promise brings on the tears
That spill from my eyes, so weary from years -
That have passed me on by, lord they've passed me on by.

As the teardrops flow freely, like raindrops in space,
I turn up my face, and am blinded by grace
Searching the skies as though some far off place -
Can help make it right, for just one more night -
Still time passes by, time drifts right on by

It is then I hear answers, falling like rain,
Bringing out rainbows, and washing my pain
Clearing the path for my heart and my soul
Sweet words of wisdom, whisper answers I know
That slow time from passing, passing on by.

Hear now the wisdom of Angels and Grace!
Grab on to gratitude, fill empty space
Remember the choice to take or to give
Is in choosing to die, or choosing to live.
Before time flies on by, Before time has gone by.

—Julie Courtright, a.k.a. Seraphina, Copyright 2008 – All rights reserved.